thoughts and things.

insisting joy

2011-05-14T07:02:00.000-07:00

You'll have to excuse my absence. The past two months have seemed like a whirlwind, interrupting and invading normalcy with such unrelenting vigor I thought I may not withstand it's pace. But Jason and I have experienced God's grace, we've seen glimpses of his reconciliation begin in dark places, and we've rejoiced in his kindness and goodness to us as we approach our wedding day. It's funny to think about what I pictured this season to look like. How I vowed will all the energy I could that it would be joyous. As if I was given the power to insist gladness from my days. It has most certainly been a season of celebrating what has transpired and what is in store. What gift we have found in our families and friends who have encouraged and counseled us along the way! But, as life has a way of doing, it has held circumstances we couldn't foresee. Honestly, I didn't always handle them with grace. Why now? Again, believing in my desires more than the truth that God so sweetly reminds us of in Isaiah 55:

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,

neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.

For as the heavens are higher than the earth,

so are my ways higher than your ways

and my thoughts than your thoughts."

Oh yeah. Of course, they are. Oh, that His ways would be higher than ours. That truth is life giving, for in it we can surrender and trust. Knowing that God is not merely in this very moment, but in all our moments to come. Also knowing, he is deeply concerned about the refinement of his people, that means perspective may just take it's own time to take form.

I feel it impossible, and perhaps unnecessary, to try and share all that has happened. But I also feel it's time to be a little vulnerable and cease trying to insist joy from my days. Rather than insisting, I'm learning to appreciate it's presence along with the not-so-joyous things as well.

One story I must share, that is long overdue, will be one of my favorites to tell the rest of my life. A little tale of a clueless lady and a sweet gentleman that ended up in Chicago one Saturday morning.

longing

2011-04-08T06:13:00.000-07:00

"For as the earth brings forth its sprouts,

and as a garden causes what is sown in it to sprout up,

so the Lord God will cause righteousness and praise to sprout up before all nations."

Isaiah 61:11

This morning I'm found longing. For more of who He is and more of his kingdom to come here on earth. Longing for the day that all nations will stand united before the throne of a Mighty God who has drawn them together by his grace and steadfast love. Longing for my life to reflect that very truth. Longing for more of him and less of me.

the best surprise of all

2011-03-07T06:02:00.001-08:00

I am going to marry my best friend.

A more detailed story, where I can brag on him, is soon to come. No worries.

paper & string

2011-02-15T13:41:00.000-08:00

I made a paper heart garland for Valentine's Day, don't judge. I have a serious love for paper and string so this just seemed like a perfect combination for decorating. Today, however, is the day after Valentine's so it seems as though today would be the day to take down the hearts. But my dilemma is whether to leave them lingering in suspension for a few days or take them down. Perhaps I'm putting off taking them down because I have the best Valentine in the land. Either way, here they are, I guess they'll just have to stay up for a couple more days.

the difference in a clenched fist

2011-01-21T05:10:00.001-08:00

I'm becoming more convinced everyday that surrender is something I will continue to learn throughout my life. At different stages, at different levels, all the while applying this understanding to the very day and situation I am in. I think about surrender in three stages:

identifying what is before me
exposing what is before me (which is accompanied by acceptance in it's presence, sharing it with others and exposing my recognition of it to God)

Often times this is where I find momentary satiation in my surrender. I recognized and then I exposed what it was, but I am missing a critical part of true surrender in all of my surrendering.

unclenching my fist.

The most crucial facet of true surrender. It's the hardest part I think. Unclenching my fist as I expose what is before me, releasing control and most importantly trusting (I'm talking about REALLY trusting) the Lord is in control. I've been choosing to actively participate in that last part. Sometimes, usually when the thing before me is unpleasant, it's so easy to let go. With gladness I'll let it go, hand it off, and in that moment I know that I know that I'm over my head. But that dismissing is perhaps almost as dangerous as having a fist unclenched. I don't know about you, but being too dismissive brings me to a passive attitude about what is going on. I know I'm not in control so I excuse not truly experiencing the circumstance and happenings of my life. Then there's this other scenario where the happenstance is good. When it's easy to rejoice in my circumstances. And still, there in that moment, the Lord wants all of who I am. Not to steal my joy, but to make much of his name in my suffering and in my happiness. So, I say all this to say that I strongly believe that the Lord, in his grace and goodness, wants us to experience him in his fullness. And somehow he beautifully works our surrender into knowing him more and truly living. In every moment of our day, every situation, every feeling and thought. So good and bad, difficult and easy, he's present and he's teaching. And I'm learning to embrace that more and more. Knowing that I will seek and find him when I seek him with all of who I am (Jeremiah 29:13).

lately

2011-01-15T13:38:00.000-08:00

My board of bulletins has been keeping a make shift journal of sorts. The creative part of me loves to have things revolving on and off this board. A couple occupants are permanently stationed: a map of midtown, an outline of Turkey, a mini-clip board & foreign language flash cards. But apart from that, this space is where I like to place new ideas, inspiration and mementos (yes, I'm sentimental. Don't judge). My favorite right now is a portion of Gustave Caillebotte's Les raboteurs de parquet (The Floor Scrapers), a product of visiting the impressionist exhibit at the Frist over Christmas break. I love the ordinary strength captured in this piece and the simplicity of it all. So, today I'm found at my desk dreaming about a couple fun future projects. Hoping you have little reminders in your home of places you've been, things that inspire or people you love. (Or any combination of the three). Happy Saturday!

Christi & Ryan

2011-01-08T16:38:00.000-08:00

One of my dearest friends, Christi, got married right before Christmas. Her wedding pictures are stunning. I'm not talking about, I-think-they-are-stunning-because-I'm-biased-because-she's-my-friend. They are stunning.

Click here: C & Ryan.

You'll see.

where in the world

2011-01-02T14:24:00.000-08:00

did 2010 go?

i'm not sure.

and as a new year washes onto shore, the resurgence of resolutions fill the air and motivations are ignited anew. too often i try to justify my resentment towards new years resolutions. today i'm found appreciative at the thought of a continuous wave of restoration that washes over my heart and life.

i want start this year with a refreshed heart, new desires and an inexhaustible hope. the last few months has felt somewhat like a swallow water tread. for lack of a better vocabulary, my soul is longing. increasingly longing for more.

more depth.

more understanding.

more patience.

more grace.

more compassion.

more love.

more discipline.

more steadfastness.

more of more that is found in One.

+ vs. -

2010-12-02T16:28:00.000-08:00

a conversation I had while helping a six year old little boy do his homework:

M: "Have you been practicing your subtraction? Do you have any questions before you start?"

S: "Really, I just like addition better than subtraction."

M: "That's ok, but why is that?"

S: "Well when it's like eating cookies and doing addition, you get to eat more. But when you subtract them, you have less cookies."

M: "Totally understandable."

one year ago...

2010-11-25T06:47:00.000-08:00

...we were celebrating Thanksgiving Hong Kong style.

{This little Thanksgiving bird squeezed in our convection oven.}

{This little bird was greeting us at the door.}

We laughed a lot. We transported casseroles in a caravan of taxis. We missed our families. We embraced separation from what was familiar. We failed to write down 1,000 things we are thankful for (sorry April). We learned over again that the Lord's goodness is rich and deep.

the weight of still waters

2010-11-01T18:16:00.000-07:00

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.

He makes me lie down in green pastures.

He leads me beside still waters.

He restores my soul.

He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

Psalm 23

My idea of restoration has been seemingly beset by a new understanding. As I've read through this set of scripture before, there was an overtone of a selfish fog. A picturesque moment of a strong shepherding rod in view, the greenest green pastures, and me sitting still soaking it all in. I'm quite certain, embarassingly, that I've sighed out loud before reading this psalm. But this picture, this idea that I had was lacking a serious insight of restoration. While the visuals of still waters and green pastures most certainly conjure calming notions, verse four has set my mind at a different perspective. "He restores my soul." That truth, is heavy. How does restoration happen? We continue to read on and the psalmist says, "He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake." He is restoring by leading me in places where I must trust, where faith must be pure, lest I hope in vain. He restores by fulfilling his promises, making his glory known through reconstructing a life, which was dead to sin, to walk in newness of life. So the weight of those still waters I pass by, is much heavier than before. For when the Lord is our Shepherd, we shall not want. He is the Shepherd and Overseer of our souls.

diy: inspiration

2010-09-25T12:18:00.000-07:00

The next addition for my room:

if i had a book club, i'd tell you about the book that

2010-09-18T14:47:00.000-07:00

I just finished:

The story of the Zeitoun family, located in the heart of New Orleans immediately before & after Katrina. I found the layers of family dynamics, culture, religion, integrity and justice in perfect intersections as I got lost in the reality of a modern day New Orleans.

I'm working on:

A book that is in much less need of introduction. One afternoon Jason let me borrow his copy of this intricate character's tale. Beautifully penned and undeniably entertaining.

I just broke the binding on:

A book that traveled to Hong Kong and back with me late this summer. A timely complying of truth spoken directly to the ideas and culture that are ingrained in each one of us as Americans. It is not a call to life radically for the sake of living radically. Rather, a call to live truly following Christ, surrendered to the truth laid out in scripture and written across our hearts as believers. Currently bookmarked at page 30, my soul is already refreshed and challenged by God's truth spoken through these pages.

slicing and dicing

2010-09-14T05:30:00.000-07:00

Confession #1: Today I was in the kitchen for 4 hours straight.

Confession #2: I really love being in the kitchen. I think it used to be a place that scared me. Yep, scared. Not nightmare, scared for my life scared. Scared in the sense that it was more than likely I was going to burn whatever I was cooking, or myself (which I still frequently do). I find myself lingering in the kitchen wondering what I could bake, or how I could make a meal out of whatever may happen to be in the refrigerator, or trying a new recipe when no one is home just in case it tanks miserably. This recent love affair with trying to be a culinary legend in my own mind has been accompanied by a repeat disorder with an Otis Redding album. Over and over. I'm sure my roommates are sick of it, but the kitchen doesn't seem to function as smoothly without some good music in my book. So, here's to more "Try A Little Tenderness" & olive oil.

Because I know you're just dying to know tonight's menu:

Cowboy Chicken

Fluffy New Potatoes

Steamed Broccoli

Fresh Corn on the Cob

and the finale: chocolate chip doozies (sorry Cat, I know you little less than hate that word)

because i love the snail mail

2010-09-07T10:29:00.000-07:00

Seeing the revival of the telegram made my heart happy today. Who wouldn't want to find of of these in their mailbox?

thoughts on rotation from Sunday

2010-09-07T09:21:00.000-07:00

"Love costs us the whole concept of self-preservation."

a playlist & a project

2010-09-05T11:36:00.000-07:00

A few good tunes.

"Try A little Tenderness": Otis Redding
"May Waltz (Acoustic)": Brooke Fraser
"Our Kind of Love": Lady Antebellum
"Feeling Good": Nina Simone
"I Got That Feeling": James Brown

[play all the way through.]

"Where the Light Is": John Mayer
"Legends of Soul": Otis Redding

Add in: buttons.

1/3 yard of fabric.

tearing.

folding. tacking. repeating.

again, and again. 38 times, again.

a snap to the side.

a button to cover.

and voila: a swell little anchor pillow sham.

hello, my name is...

2010-09-02T19:42:00.000-07:00

I have been asked a lot lately, "How do you feel being back in the states?" There are so many facets of transition that intersect the answer to that question. Of course it has been so fun to see friends and family, to hear the sound of that distinctive slow Southern draw, and to interact without having to translate using hand motions. But if I boil down all the prefaces and the intersecting factors, I feel like the new kid in class. You know the first day of school feeling? It's so wonderfully nerve-racking. Pushing through awkward introductions, getting lost, going the wrong way (down a one-way street: can we talk about embarrassing?), making new friends, and finding a new rhythm of life. I'm still trying to figure out where I fit in this new place. I'm different than I was a year ago, the place is different, the people are different. Different is most certainly OK, and today it just means that life is contrasting what it once was. Really thankful to be in a place where I am still learning each day. Most of the time lessons have revealed themselves so unexpectedly, but then again don't the best ones always come that way? Here's to a deep breath and a fresh start.

'all his work'

2010-08-14T19:12:00.000-07:00

For the word of the Lord is upright, and all his work is done in faithfulness. Psalm 33:4

2 days

2010-08-14T18:47:00.001-07:00

Two days left till I head to HKG and with all the little might it can conjure, my mind is trying to soak up Hong Kong. My heart has been so blessed by the last year.

Certainly more depth of understanding will come in due time.

Certainly I will miss this place.

Certainly the Lord's goodness will continue in it's humbling steadfast fashion.

via maggie

2010-08-02T18:11:00.001-07:00

"every one of us is called upon, probably many times, to start a new life. a frightening diagnosis, a marriage, a move, loss of a job...and onward full tilt we go, pitched and wrecked and absurdly resolute, driven in spite of everything to make good on a new shore. to be hopeful, to embrace one possibility after another- that is surely the basic instinct...crying out: high tide! time to move out into the glorious debris. time to take this life for what it is."

-barbara kingsolver, high tide in tucson

noah's here!

2010-07-29T19:03:00.000-07:00

The newest addition to the Littlepage family has arrived! He is the cutest and sweetest little guy. Incredibly thrilled for these dear friends. No doubt they are going to be wonderful parents.

redefine

2010-07-24T21:36:00.000-07:00

After taking enough time to let silence be a comfortable companion this morning, I was able to think and pray over the last year. All that it's meant, all that it will mean and all that is changing in me because of it. Recent years have been full with a theme of restoration in my life. Isaiah 61 followed me across continents and through so many seasons, meaning a million beautiful things along the way. This morning the Lord was so kind to speak straight to my heart and show me that after restoring much, he is redefining much. He has rebuilt places long devastated and is teaching me what it means to be truly alive in those places, knowing more of him & becoming more like Christ in the process. That means that my old self has to die. Harsh language? It's that critical. It's that important. It is that new. It's new life. Ah, let your soul sit with that for a moment. My heart just turns over on itself in the thought that God is not through with me yet. Some days I feel like such a mess. You know those deep moments that you walk out of full just to find the world looks different. And that is just the thing, the places that are so hard to walk into and through, they shape us. Our experience with the world can't, and shouldn't, be the same. I admit that it's frustrating to me at first. I'm more frustrated with myself than anything, wrestling with this feeling that I can't make sense of it all. But with much grace and love the Father walks me a couple more steps to see that he's teaching me how to live. Each day here is another part of him redefining my understanding so that I know love in the deepest parts of me. He is teaching me what it means to trust, to love and to forgive. All over again. Restoring and redefining.

things along that way that are O.K. & not O.K.

2010-07-17T00:15:00.000-07:00

things that are O.K.:

Listening to the blues and overcast skies. They just belong together.
Smiling with your teeth. Half smiles (no teeth involved) feel just, half-y.
The collision of every walk of life that happens on public transportation.
Noah will be here so soon.
Ice cream surprises.
True community. Recognizing more everyday how blessed I am by the people I get to call friends.

things that are not O.K.:

Jeans in July in Hong Kong. I confess I have rationalized jeans while indoors in air-conditioning which proves to be faulty logic almost every time. You would think that the rain season here would wash away some of the humidity and allow everyone to enjoy walking under the intense-you-are-keenly-aware-that-you-are-closer-to-the-equator-summer sun. But no, here it decides to add another dose of thickness to the air which then likens walking to swimming. This can start to be confusing because you know that you just took a step outside the apartment and not a leap for a cannonball into the pool. In the same thought, I would never go swimming in jeans, so why would I wear them in July in Hong Kong? The answer perhaps is simple wishful thinking.
The rant I just went on about jeans in HK. Thank you for reading if your eyes have made it this far.

trust

2010-07-12T18:21:00.000-07:00

Trust is this theme that the Lord will not relent on threading through my life. Trust is not merely recognizing an opportunity to surrender, it's an all encompassing recognition that God is changing my heart & mind to believe and act in the truth that He is good.

preposterous

2010-07-09T00:20:00.000-07:00

So I sat down to read the other morning and realized that one of the short stack of books on my bed side table held a similar characteristic between it's pages, a bookmark. I know it doesn't seem so preposterous that my books are sandwiching bookmarks, isn't that where bookmarks belong? Inside books? Obviously. The preposterous thing is that my bookmarks seem to find residence about 3/4 of the way through and then the binding of a new book is bent back and my interest drifts towards the beginnings of a new book. I think the creative part of me really enjoys new things, new ideas, new experiences and new starts. It's the beauty of creativity I suppose. But I want to be someone who can appreciate something new and enjoy it all the more as it becomes familiar and known. I want to soak in the richness that comes with depth and time. So I'm starting with my books, going back to the one that has been neglected for far too long and moving my little bookmark till it no longer belongs within those pages. Here's to learning something new each day, even in the things that are familiar.

thank you jet lag...

2010-06-11T05:34:00.000-07:00

..for waking me up at 4 a.m. and allowing my heart to be saturated with truth before the sunrise. "But I will sing of your strength; I will sing aloud of your steadfast love in the morning. For you have been to me a fortress and refuge in the day of my distress. O my Strength, I will sing praises to you, for you, O God, are my fortress, the God who shows me steadfast love." Psalm 59:16 & 17

snapshots

2010-05-31T09:32:00.001-07:00

the harbor.

we all scream for ice cream.

a hong kong classic.

truth for today

2010-05-27T18:18:00.000-07:00

Our faith is counted to us as righteousness.

(Romans 4:20-25)

free knowledge for you, you're welcome.

2010-05-23T20:49:00.000-07:00

In honor of my fondness for foggy London town: I learned the other day that Big Ben is the name of the bell in the Clock Tower of the Palace of Westminster. All this time the Clock Tower has been neglected of it's proper name. Although I have to admit that Big Ben seems like a much more interesting label. London keeps inching its way up the list of places I'd love to visit soon, perhaps I'll have a picture of the Clock Tower to show you one day. Until then you have a free fun fact for today.

a couple more reasons

2010-05-22T04:42:00.000-07:00

Simple emails like this one from Trace:

"I'm at the Huntsville Starbucks, it made me think of you."

So much of me wanted to blink my eyes and be at Starbucks sitting across the table from her, finding ourselves in the midst of conversation in an all too familiar coffee shop and talking about about all that has gone in the last 9 months. Perhaps you aren't a supporter of the corporate coffee tycoon, but as soon as I tried a white chocolate mocha (which I'm convinced is the healthiest thing on the menu) I knew Starbucks & I had started a relationship I wasn't going to be able to end. I confess that I used to disdain the taste of their brewed coffee, and still do most of the time, but when there's no coffee in the apartment it is usually my quickest remedy. The times I don't mind drinking Starbucks coffee at all is with my dad. Without question he will spend a few minutes at the coffee preparation station, sit down, take a sip of his coffee and shake his head saying "Whewwww, that's strong stuff" and make his way for some more milk or sugar. Dad is pretty particular about how he likes his coffee, but it's one of those endearing things that reminds me of mornings at home. All that to say, I'm excited about the conversations yet to be had at Starbucks this summer & I'm starting to wonder if I could ask Starbucks for a sponsorship in accordance to the amount of time and money I spend at their locations across the globe. I'll keep you updated with their offers.

this morning

2010-05-18T18:45:00.000-07:00

The city has greeted me from a different window. The smog and the stacked concrete still welcoming the day in the peculiar constant way they do. This morning I am found thankful for new beginnings, and for all that has come to pass that enables me to appreciate all that is yet to come.

quotation

2010-05-10T19:13:00.000-07:00

"A sunset is what our lives should be: quiet, noble, and unhurried." C. L. Rawlins

manic monday

2010-05-10T09:02:00.001-07:00

3 little reasons I'm going to miss Hong Kong in June.

happy mum's day

2010-05-09T07:29:00.001-07:00

Happy Mother's Day!

Mom, I am so thankful for you.

Thank you for your continuous support, servant spirit, love of laughter, and of course your pancakes.

Zach & I wouldn't be the same without you.

Teresa, thank you for being such an incredible step-mom.

Thanks for being a woman of prayer, quick to listen, and loving us girls so well.

You are such a gift.

[I love you both so much! Can't wait to see you soon. So blessed to call you mom.]

why i was thankful for Saturday

2010-05-09T07:10:00.000-07:00

via bullet points:

A slow morning consumed with reading.
The sun decided to peak through the clouds for a couple hours.
An afternoon spent by the harbor.
Chai Tea Latte & a couple bites of a chocolate doughnut.
Laughter.
Grocery shopping without having to buy an extra little plastic bag.
Homemade salsa.
Dinner and a movie with J.

friday

2010-05-07T07:56:00.000-07:00

My morning did circles around this group of verses:

"No distrust made him (Abraham) waver concerning the promise of God,

but he grew strong in his faith as he gave glory to God,

fully convinced that God was able to do what he had promised. That is why his faith was "counted to him as righteousness." But the words "it was counted to him" were not written for his sake alone, but for ours also. It will be counted to us who believe in him who raised from the dead Jesus our Lord, who was delivered up for our trespasses and raised for our justification."

Romans 4:20-25

Fully convinced.

Fully. Completely. Entirely. To the furthest extent. Fully.

It's powerful isn't it?

In the afternoon I went with Jason around Sha Tin, acting as the official camera bag holder while he took photos for a new project. I love how a camera gives one gumption to do things they wouldn't normally do, like stand on public seating, sit on the ground near the bus stop, climb on part of an elevated abandoned parking deck, set up your tripod in the que for the train, which we may or may not have done. It was a fun afternoon rounded off by time with friends, a great meal, and strawberry cake made by sweet Catherine.

Time for Saturday- it looks like there is going to be sunshine!

thursday

2010-05-07T07:44:00.000-07:00

Another day of productivity. Filling out forms, writing emails, and grocery shopping. I'm sure by now you are fully captivated by my activities, but rest assured the best part of the day was family dinner which included friends we've had the joy to know recently and some over the past few months. It's so neat to see how our introductions that started in an English class, have grown into genuine friendships. I'm thankful for the way that we can come together, with all our different experiences and perspectives, and have a greater understanding of one another without judgement or expectation. Thankful for their honesty, for their questions, for their knowledge, and for their patience as we ask questions as well. These dear friends are teaching me so much.

wed nes day

2010-05-05T18:27:00.000-07:00

Wednesday I spent almost 10 hours straight looking at my computer screen. I have a whole new respect for people who work with computers for the majority of their day. I think I am just too fidgety to sit still that long. After dinner, I realized that I was being counter productive by trying to press myself to type any longer. So I pulled out a canvas I bought months ago, brushed the dust of my paint brushes, pressed play on You've Got Mail (confession: I watch this movie at least once every 3 months. I have a repeat problems with movies I really enjoy.) and took my time creating something new.

tuesday

2010-05-04T19:31:00.000-07:00

Tuesday started out with a to-do list and a cup of coffee. I love a list, as I've mentioned a time or two. This love can get out of hand sometimes, hence the reason for consolidating into one to-do list for the next month that includes all things big and small to be done. All that to say, the morning yielded much more productivity and a sense of calm knowing how to best allocate my time in the weeks ahead. In the early afternoon I headed out into the city placing a couple check marks by requested souvenirs from Hong Kong. And after my scavenger hunt was done, I still had about an hour until I was supposed to meet Jas for dinner at the Turkish restaurant. Considering the crowds were only growing thicker in the midst of the markets, I decided that time would be well spent with a book and a cup of Turkish tea rather than frustrated at being ricocheted in between shoppers in a frenzy. When I reached the restaurant, it was empty apart from one of the brothers that runs the restaurant. He invited me to sit down and a conversation started that left my heart heavy for this friend. In respect to his situation I won't go into detail, but shortly after our conversation started Jason arrived and the conversation continued into a place of real honesty. I was so thankful that no other costumers had arrived and that my bookmark didn't move that afternoon so that conversation was able to happen. Those moments of sharing life with people on a genuine heart level, those are priceless. It was there that my heart was reminded of what I've been reading lately about not only being hearers of the truth but doers. For in the union of those two things, we are not left the same. But to step out in faith seems risky. For it is not always logical, it is definitely not always comfortable. What would it look like to risk loving people well? To risk asking hard questions, to risk going out of your way, to risk feeling misunderstood, to risk not being loved in return, to risk in light of the love that satiates the heart of every believer. In all honesty, I think it's hardly a risk at all. If our hope is secure, our purpose set, our portion enough- the risks I listed above seem to be erased. And in that knowledge, there is such freedom to love well without reservation.

two three.

2010-05-04T19:07:00.000-07:00

Welcome to 23 Ash!

I hope your day is wonderful.

Thank you for being such a great sister to me and MC.

Thanks for always laughing with me/at me- we both know how accident prone I am.

Thanks for understanding.

Thanks for loving Christmas time with me (and ALL the ornaments on the tree).

Thanks for trying to teach me how to shoot a basketball.

Thanks for riding skateboards with me down Jane Drive. Sitting down on the skateboard of course.

Thanks for your honesty.

I am so glad you're my sister.

I love you.

Can't wait to see you soon!

a week in my shoes

2010-05-03T17:31:00.000-07:00

Somewhere along the way of sharing my thoughts & things, I stunted myself from sharing more often. Perhaps it's been circumstantial, perhaps it's been uncertainty, most likely it's been a combination of the two plus a desire to share something worth reading. Not that my thoughts are more valuable than the next, surely there are thousands of other blogs that spur you towards creativity and a deeper level of thought. But whether I recognize it in the moment or after the moment (sometimes that stubborn resolve causes delay), I'm learning each day and being transformed in the midst of it all to look more like Christ (2 Corinthians 3:17 & 18, Romans 12:2). The seemingly mundane, laughter shared with friends, formative decisions, sleepless nights, and everything in between is part of that process. And that transformation is worth sharing, not because of who I am but because of who Christ is. I know I'm far from having it figured out, but if for some reason you are still clicking over to here read: thank you.

Here's to round 2 of 'a week in my shoes'.

from & for

2010-04-29T17:55:00.000-07:00

"For in it (the gospel) the righteousness of God is revealed

from faith for faith,

as it is written, "The righteous should live by faith."

Romans 1:17

tally mark 4

2010-04-25T19:41:00.001-07:00

the best batch yet.

reasons

2010-04-22T03:15:00.001-07:00

After looking at a calendar of June for the better part of the afternoon, I'm starting to get really excited about being in the states this summer. This lovely little photo embodies 2 reasons why:

MC: my little sister who can makes laugh harder than almost anyone I know, she's just incredible.
TCBY: oh how I've missed you. (MC, I've obviously missed you too.)

I have a feeling lists of ''reasons" will be frequently appearing in the upcoming month.

pennies from heaven

2010-04-21T23:58:00.000-07:00

Bing Crosby says to make sure your umbrella is upside down when it rains and today my umbrella decided to take initiative and catch my fortune of rain drops as I made my way to the MTR station. The wind acted as a guide as it pushed me through the maze of battling umbrellas and ricocheted between myself and the buildings lining the street. My black satin flats tiptoed around puddles until my depth perception failed me (which happens far too often) and my foot landed completely submerged. At this point rain was blowing under my umbrella and I pulled my purse in close to my torso like it was going to help in some way, still holding my lovely little blue brella over my head as some sort of solace. It was at that moment my umbrella, so poetically, did a back flip as I passed a woman buying an umbrella on the side of the street. With the train station in view, I couldn't help but laugh. Yep, out loud. Thankfully, the train was full of other travelers who were dressed in rain as well.

extra cheese please

2010-04-16T21:40:00.000-07:00

"As for man, his days are like grass; he flourishes like a flower of the field; for the wind passes over it, and it is gone, and its place knows it no more.

But the steadfast love of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear him..."

Psalm 103: 15-17

This morning was spent in conversation with one of my closest friends using the phrases "time keeps passing so quickly", "it seems like just yesterday", "remember when..." and "Oh geez, we are starting to use those phrases that have echoed around us for years". Our realization was met with reflective laughter and an honest joy. This morning I'm found hopeful. I'm found undeserving of this precious life I've been given. I'm found thankful for this short 'bloom'. It's going to be a beautiful day.

divine mercy

2010-04-12T23:58:00.000-07:00

"We know Jesus has saved our lives from divine judgement. Think of it, Christ has taken all of your filth and my filth, all of your evil wicked thoughts and my evil wicked thoughts, he has taken every single one of them and he has put them on his son instead of us. Jesus has taken the punishment due every single one of our sins upon himself he has delivered us from divine judgement. And not only that, not only deliverance, he has freed us. We don't have to go back to our sin like we see over and over again in the book of Judges. We are free from sin, free to walk in victory over sin, not to go back to that from which we have been saved from. So what shall we do then? Shall we sit back with that news? Jesus has saved us from divine judgement. Shall we sit back with that news and just soak it in while we turn a deaf ear to millions upon millions of people who have never heard that? Absolutely not. We are not saved to soak it in, we are saved to spend our lives to proclaim divine mercy. That is what we do. We give ourselves, we give our lives, we give our family, we give our time, we give our money, we give everything we have: our very lives, making this mercy known to the ends of the earth. That is the only response to the one true God."

-sermon Depravity & Deliverance, David Platt

bread for today

2010-04-10T19:25:00.000-07:00

During my time in the Philippines, I've been waking up with the dawn. Literally. I really enjoy the early morning, but waking up while it is still dark outside is early even for me. Instead of fighting frustration for an hour before breakfast is ready, the Lord has been good to guide me towards greeting the sunrise over the South Sea with a cup of coffee and the Psalms. This morning Psalm 103 poured refreshment and perspective in front of me to walk in today. This Psalm beckons one into praise from the onset, appropriating our affections towards the hope of our souls.

Praise the Lord, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name.

Praise the lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits- who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.

The Lord works righteousness and justice for all the oppressed.

He made known his ways to Moses, his deeds to the people of Israel:

The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.

he will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger forever; he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities.

For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him;

as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust.

As for man, his days are like grass, he flourishes like a flower of the field; the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more.

But from everlasting to everlasting the Lord's love is with those who fear him, and his righteousness with their children's children- with those who keep his covenant and remember to obey his precepts.

The Lord has established his throne in heaven, and his kingdom rules over all.

Praise the Lord, you his angels, you mighty ones who do his bidding, who obey his word.

Praise the Lord, all his heavenly hosts, you servants who do his will.

Praise the Lord, all his works everywhere in his dominion.

Praise the Lord, O my soul.

snapshots 2

2010-04-08T06:13:00.000-07:00

[clockwise: i really like this rice bag, demo vegetables for sustainable living, Values/Health/Livelihood class in the slums, lines, sweet souls]

snapshots

2010-04-04T03:18:00.001-07:00

Last week I got to experience Cebu with some of my favorite people. And this week I've had a great opportunity to adventure around the Philippines with some wonderful people from ICM . I've really enjoyed seeing a new part of the Philippines, this place is really fascinating. I only have a few minutes on the internet but I wanted to share a couple pictures along the way. [from left to right: looking out from a Japanese tunnel left from war, typical market collection, the Mayon volcano in Legaspi, church ruins after an eruption by Mayon in 1814]. Hope you enjoy, there's more to come.

pancake muffins

2010-03-31T17:59:00.001-07:00

Sounds tasty hm? I thought so too. Hence the reason why I tried to bake them this morning. The process was just fine, everything was going well. The muffins cooked until golden brown and their aroma + a fresh pot of coffee was the perfect scent to welcome in the morning. The muffins turned out A O.K., but the maple syrup glaze (where did I ever get the novel idea I could make a glaze?) acted more like glue than a lovely little glaze. After I was able to separate my teeth again, I tried them sans glaze and they were light and delicious. Here's the recipe if you feel so inclined: click right here. Now it's time to finish my cup of coffee and finish packing for my next adventure.

i love a good question

2010-03-31T07:03:00.000-07:00

"What's your favorite sentence?"

-Cecilia Liu

thankful

2010-03-24T01:18:00.001-07:00

My apologies for a lack of writing lately. This season of life has been so full. Like other seasons of growth, the learning curve is steep but worth the change and the joy that is exchanged for new depths. One would think, as I am so prone to as well, that in clarity everything will be more simple, more reasonable even. My mind wakes most mornings reeling through what lies ahead on the most daily of tasks and the form of the future. The truth is that clarity in and of itself doesn't hold all the answers in it's grip. I'm drawn back to the satiation for my longing, found only in Christ Himself.

creativity with a cause

2010-03-12T07:56:00.000-08:00

one of the blogs i check almost everyday. also, one of those ideas that you just wish you had enough gumption to carry out: the uniform project.

lessons from habakkuk 2:1

2010-03-02T01:15:00.000-08:00

Our church family at IECC has been walking through the book of Habakkuk. We're covering the book in just 3 weeks, but it's been refreshing to really understand the context and gain fresh perspective. Last week (sorry about the delay) we worked through Habakkuk 1:12-2:20. My pen began to scribble in overdrive when we began reading in chapter 2. Habakkuk is speaking of the Lord in verses 1 which reads:

I will take my stand at my watchpost and

[ascend to gain fresh perspective]

station myself on the tower,

[be faithful]

and look out to see what He will say to me,

[be teachable]

and what I will answer concerning my complaint.

[respond in humility]

Oh how my heart needed that [fresh perspective]. Far too often I'm tempted to dissect my circumstances until I'm so focused on them that what matters has become part of my blurred peripheral vision. The Lord gently guided me back to my 'watchpost' to gaze at his Sovereignty and rest in truth.

you know you're in hk when...

2010-02-26T23:47:00.000-08:00

...you lose your mailbox key, and the technician opens your mailbox with a screwdriver and a hammer. Not to worry, there are two copies of the new key.

it's a process

2010-02-26T06:49:00.000-08:00

On Christmas morning Matt & April made these fantastic cinnamon rolls. We're talking about made from scratch, way too much sugar, delicious cinnamon rolls. So I gathered some gumption, the recipe from April, encouragement and help from Jason, and decided I would attempt to make them as well.

Let's pause and go over some basic information:

Matt & April are amazing cooks
I am an amateur at best, but I enjoy learning [effort counts for something right?]
bullet points were probably not necessary, but I am glad you're still reading this.

This past baking session was stroke 3 in my attempt tally box. And it proved to be the best one yet. I'll be the first to tell you that I'm still in the process of learning how to cook, but this

recipe is a process in and of itself.

We're talking about a couple hours of mixing, kneading, waiting , rolling, sprinkling, rolling, sprinkling [I recently learned the art of rolling c-rolls. Yes, I said art, it takes practice people.] and cutting- before there is a plethora of cinnamon rolls across the kitchen. I function best when a recipe includes exact measurements, far too detailed step by step instructions, and pictures just make my day [Hence the reason I can get lost in recipes from TasteSpotting & Pioneer Woman far too often]. Well, this little cinnamon roll recipe leaves room for a little flexibility. So, whether it suits your fancy, or cramps your baking style, I thought I'd share just in case you were in the market for a new recipe. I'll be sure to keep you updated on upcoming tally marks. Hope you enjoy!

Parry Rolls from: twopeasandtheirpod.com

2 packages yeast, dissolved in 1 cup lukewarm water

6 tablespoons shortening

1 cup sugar

7 cups flour or more as needed (it will take more)

2 cups hot water

2 eggs, beaten

1 tablespoon salt

Softened butter

Brown sugar

Raisins

Cinnamon

[remember that flexibility thing we talked about: example A]

Add yeast to cup of lukewarm water and sprinkle in a little sugar. Set aside for about 5 minutes. Add shortening, sugar, and salt to hot water ad cool to lukewarm. Stir in 2 cups of flour and mix until smooth. Add yeast and mix again until smooth.

Add beaten eggs.

Stir in remained of flour, a little at a time until no more can be mixed in. Remove the mixer attachment and knead by hand, adding flour until dough does not stick to the bowl. Remove from bowl and knead until dough feels satiny and looks smooth [this is where I need a picture] .

Cover and let rise for 30 minutes.

Lightly knead and roll out into rectangular shape. Spread with softened butter. Sprinkle on brown sugar, raisins and cinnamon. (Make sure you use lots of brown sugar...you can omit the raisins, and sprinkle on loads of cinnamon [loads: how much is that?]. we never measure but be very generous [never measure: glad I'm following your recipe: example D].)

Roll into one long roll. To cut use a piece of string or floss.

Place on well greased pans and let rise until double in bulk. Bake at 425 degrees for 10 minutes.

Reduce heat to 350 and bake until brown- only about 5-7 more minutes. After cooled frost.

frosting recipe

Butter

Vanilla

Powdered Sugar

Milk

I'm not sure on the amount [yes, the recipe really says this]! Whisk until you get the right consistency and frost the rolls.

FIFTEEN DAYS!

2010-02-19T01:43:00.000-08:00

Until my sweet friend Hannah and a team from North Metro Church in Atlanta come to visit us here in Hong Kong. {Han: you better get to packin', you're going to be here tomorrow. maybe not tomorrow, but two weeks will fly by before you know and then it'll be time to come and you won't be packed and you'll be surprised it's time for your trip and be all in a tizzy and we don't want that. so, you better get to packin'.}

kung hei fat choy!

2010-02-17T20:28:00.000-08:00

In other words: Happy New Year! Yes, I am fully aware that it is the middle of February. For those of you who may be located in the Western hemisphere, I'm sorry that you were not within ear shot of the fireworks/pots & pans/red pocket/everybody is off work and in the mall extravaganza that flooded this weekend to celebrate Chinese New Year. Despite the rain and chill that rolled in with the festivities, I loved being able to just be a witness as everyone prepared for time with family and the start of a new year. We are still learning new culture lessons every day and enjoying watching them play out before our eyes. Mary, Zach & Micah definitely out celebrated any of us when they purchased inflatable tiger hats to wear during the festivities. Appropriately so, it is the year of the tiger. As soon as I have photo evidence I'll make sure to share. Monday night there was a fireworks display scheduled at the harbor. (Of the few things I do know, I know that people here don't joke around when it comes to fireworks, they invented them-literally.) So we went to the harbor early to ensure some good seats for the show. As the temperature continued to drop and the gray clouds that loomed over the buildings did not dissolve, we decided that the fireworks would probably be delayed and warm dinner sounded much more appealing than letting the rain spit on us for another couple hours. A group of us cozied into a booth in a pizza place, excited to be indoors and in the company of good friends. And just around the time that they bring that good bread and oil to dip it in, the TVs strategically placed around the restaurant put our assumptions to shame. A panoramic shot of the harbor came up and for the following 30 minutes we watched as fireworks lit up the skyline in a wonderful display. Lesson learned: the Chinese don't hesitate when it is time to celebrate. Rain or shine, celebrate we will. Although we missed out on the fireworks, we did catch little glimpses of different people celebrating across the city:

It's a gift to be here. Learning that more each day too.

laissez les bon temps roulez

2010-02-16T02:49:00.000-08:00

Half a world away, some one is cutting into the purple/green/gold icing of a king cake, beginning the all too elaborate celebration of Mardi Gras. I have such distinct memories from my childhood of my Papa {my dad's dad} telling us stories about "Nwalens" in with his slow Louisiana draw blending into the laces of French influence he inherited from his parents. For years he would make the trip from Alabama to Louisiana to reconnect with family and reminisce through memories with laughter. We all knew he just had to get back enjoy a real bowl of jambalaya. Although our family doesn't celebrate Mardi Gras extensively by any means, I really love the idea of taking time to thumb through recently inherited photo gems and rekindling an appreciation for my family this time of the year. I'm not sure I'll ever grow weary of hearing stories from years past and learning more about the lives that intertwined themselves to create this wonderful story of our family. {And who doesn't love an extra little occasion to eat cake, I know I'm in.}

deeper places

2010-02-14T18:09:00.000-08:00

"What if God chooses to call us to things in our lives, not because of our qualifications and our abilities, but in order to lead us to a place where we are radically dependent on his presence?"

- David Platt

press play

2010-02-08T17:39:00.000-08:00

"Breakdown" : Missy Higgins
"Love Ain't Gonna Let You Down" : Jamie Cullum
"Crossroads" : John Mayer
"All Creatures of Our God & King" : Patty Griffin
"Three More Days" : Ray LaMontagne
"A Man of Many Words" : Buddy Guy & Junior Wells
"That's Life" : Frank Sinatra
"Hurricane" : Athelete

"hold your incense high"

2010-02-04T19:31:00.000-08:00

There are a great number of temples in Hong Kong. Some humble, others presenting themselves much more elaborate. But regardless of it's appearance there is a consistent characteristic that will identify a temple area before the door frames cross your vision: incense. The aroma around the courts is full and distinctive. As the Chinese New Year approaches, temple courts are brimming with visitors coming to hold their incense high. Walking past one of the most frequented temples here in Hong Kong last week, it was very apparent who was there to pay respects. They waved their collection of incense sticks high as the sticks burned, releasing that unique scent. It's identifying and it weaves its way into your clothes, reminding you through the rest of the day where you've been.

The rest of the day unfolded in an ordinary fashion, but 2 Corinthians 2:14 { For we are to God the aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing. } set itself on repeat in my heart. This incredible thought accompanied it's repetition: that we, God's children, are set apart for such a worthy purpose. What a blissful thought. I pray that when the world looks in on our lives, they should see truth lifted high and that our longings would reflect a heavenly longing that burns in us.

haiti

2010-01-24T05:22:00.000-08:00

because my words fall so short. some pictures from the big picture.

{Lord, rebuild this place and these people with the knowledge of your steadfast love.}

for the birds

2010-01-24T05:20:00.001-08:00

william cowper

2010-01-21T20:03:00.000-08:00

A dear friend recently shared the lyrics to this hymn and I thought I'd share them with you as well. As I was reading over them I decided to do a little research about the author and learned that ol' William:

wrote/co-wrote 66+ hymns over his lifetime along with numerous poems
lived most of his days in Norfolk, England
studied to be a lawyer but never practiced law
suffered from manic depression
used his literary influence to support the anti-slavery movement in England
he was close friends with John Newton, author of "Amazing Grace"
"God Moves in a Mysterious Way" is the last hymn he wrote

"God Moves in a Mysterious Way", written by William Cowper in 1774.

God moves in a mysterious way His wonders to perform; He plants His footsteps in the sea And rides upon the storm.

Deep in unfathomable mines Of never failing skill He treasures up His bright designs And works His sovereign will.

Ye fearful saints, fresh courage take; The clouds ye so much dread Are big with mercy and shall break In blessings on your head.

Judge not the Lord by feeble sense, But trust Him for His grace; Behind a frowning providence He hides a smiling face.

His purposes will ripen fast, Unfolding every hour; The bud may have a bitter taste, But sweet will be the flower.

Blind unbelief is sure to err And scan His work in vain; God is His own interpreter, And He will make it plain.

mornin'

2010-01-19T19:39:00.001-08:00

This morning I got to watch the city come alive as the sun poured over the harbor and the buildings that cut into the skyline. My vision warred between the turning pages of a great book and the stillness of the city fading away. Love moments like these. Good morning Hong Kong.

[Let us know; let us press on to know the Lord; his going out is sure as the dawn; he will come to us as the showers, as the spring rains that water the earth.] Hosea 6:3

africa

2010-01-15T21:20:00.000-08:00

As I was reading through a portion of Genesis this morning, I was reminded of how good the Lord is to orchestrate our lives so that we may live in humility before him. For each life this process of being humbled will orient hearts to their proper posture through different, unique circumstances. But the great reward is always the same for those who believe in Jesus; we gain Christ and an incomparable relationship with our Creator {Philippians 3:8-9, Psalm 25:9}. In light of this reminder, I have been able to recognize countless circumstances, and new depths of knowledge, that have enabled me to realign my attention to what matters most. One specific way that has enabled me to do this is joining alongside Operation World & The Church at Brook Hills in praying over the entire world. Each day there are specific places and requests listed that enable me to engage on behalf of places I may never see and hearts I may never meet. This week the prayer focus is Africa.

Regardless of my physical presence in a place, it is incredible to think about God moving in hearts all across this globe for his name's sake. It's a beautiful thing. May we be found in awe of how he is intricately weaving our stories together for one grand story of redemption.

here and there

2010-01-06T17:08:00.000-08:00

Our friend john came to visit us for a couple weeks.

In the midst of getting acquainted with the city, we played some cards.

{and made grocery lists.}

Mary & Katie had a yoga/P90X showdown while we were waiting for our next little visitor at the airport.

Meet our newest visitor: Miss Beth. So glad to have her here.

Learning more about a unique community within the walls of a city park.

Micah, Benson & Furr have returned and it's time for some birthday celebrations.

first note of eternity

2010-01-01T17:55:00.000-08:00

I apologize for the lack of posts over the past couple weeks. The holidays here were rich and celebrating in a different culture and context most certainly yielded a deeper appreciation for the season. I love that when people asked why we celebrate we found ourselves congregating at the heart of the gospel: Emmanuel God with us. After the advent candles were extinguished, we looked back at our ebenezers that have helped form the last year and received perspective for the the days unraveling into the new year. Part of perspective came on Sunday night at church as 4 dear brothers and sisters shared their testimony and what God is continuing to do in their lives. I love hearing people's stories; how the Lord pursues after hearts and how his creativity is expressed in the redemption of lives all over the globe. Despite their varying ages, backgrounds, & experiences, one thread was constant through each story: God's compassion is abundant and he is always, always faithful.

Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope:

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.

They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

I say to myself, "The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him"

The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him;

it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.

Lamentations 3:21-26

After testimonies were shared, the band gathered on the stage and the music started out slow. Quietly my heart raced as I began to think about what the first note of eternity's song will sound like. What it will mean to be present in that moment, all the things that will have come to pass, and people from every nation gathered before the throne joining in to praise the One who is eternally faithful. It was one of those moments that I did not want to pass quickly. I wanted to just linger there for a while, to soak in the weight of eternity's song. But as my little brain reached it's capacity for recognition of the moment at hand I found myself joining in the chorus around me here in Hong Kong left with the joy granted by fresh perspective, eternal perspective, from the Lord. I pray that thought will continue to propel me into this year and through the rest of my days. What a privilege to be called a child of God and to share his great story of pursuit.

Oh how he loves us.

Here's to a new year.

So excited about what's ahead.

lately

2009-12-20T18:00:00.000-08:00

I've really missed celebrating this season of Hope with my family. As much as I love Christmas music, "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas" has sent me into tears more than once thinking about people I love and familiar gatherings. In light of those moments, I know that the Lord has purposed these days so I am choosing to press into the Father's heart and desiring to know him more. There are a few things that have made this HK Christmas memorable already:

Revisiting the age old art of decorating seasonally shaped cookies.

Fatih sharing a few pieces of baklava that his brother brought from Turkey.

Watching the construction of the tiniest gingerbread village.

Caroling at local nursing homes.

Truth that keeps my heart in check. The miracle of miracles, prophecy fulfilled...

Isaiah 9:6 "For unto us a child is born, a son will be given to us; and the government shall rest upon his shoulders; and his name will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace."

2009-12-16T20:58:00.000-08:00

We have to continue to grasp the idea/truth that our lives reflect something. It honors someone or something. It is eternally, infinitely important that we reflect Jesus.

asleep or not asleep?

2009-12-10T18:02:00.000-08:00

If you ever find yourself on a bus here in Hong Kong you will very likely find yourself seated next to a person who is sleeping, or pretending to sleep. It's a incredible thing really. People can be fully alert walking to their bus stop, interacting with others while awaiting the bus' arrival, but then as soon as they hit the seat in the bus their eyes are closed and their head tilted downwards. The best part is that they know exactly when they need to get off without lifting an eyelid. The awkward part is when the bus makes a wide turn and the person next to you really is asleep, you find yourself leaning way farther than you normally would to avoid being mistaken as a pillow. Sometimes I just want to wave my hand in front of their face to see if they would look up, but after some logical processing through that thought I realized that in the chance that they did open their eyes, it would be difficult to explain why my hand was in front of their face and not seem like a creep. Perhaps they enjoy a little power nap while in transit. Perhaps they are really perceptive and don't need visual cues to get places. Perhaps they are narcoleptic. Perhaps it's just a little game they like to play to pass the time: am I asleep or not asleep?

taking time

2009-12-08T06:01:00.000-08:00

If you know me well, you know that I love to look back through old journals and pictures that seem to capture time as it passes all too swiftly. As our team gathered together this week, we collectively practiced looking back on our experiences together this fall and what the Lord has done right before our very eyes. While many of the things mentioned were repeated as we shared, I didn't grow tired of hearing them time and time again. It seemed as if those very memories grew my appreciation and understanding for what He has done among us. He used the same situation to speak much into us as individual children and as a team. For it is only in and through and because of Him that we are satiated by His grace and provision. What a joy it is to look back and watch him make good of all that has come.

I hope that you feel connected to this portion of my journey thus far and in my desire for you to feel that I wanted to share a couple of the things that found their way from my memory to my paper:

For all the promises of God find their Yes in him [Jesus]. That is why it is through him that we utter our Amen to God for his glory. And it is God who establishes us with you in Christ, and has anointed us, and who has also put his seal on us and given us his Spirit in our hearts as a guarantee.

2 Corinthians 1:20-22

{before my eyes}

He has provided for all we need {Matthew 6:25-34}
He has most certainly prepared the way before us in a way that we must rely on him {Isaiah 30:21}
the soil of hearts softening {Matthew 13:18-23}

{in me}

a deeper desire to know him {Jeremiah 29:12 & 13}
opportunities to exercise trust in who He is {Hebrews 4:14-16}
burden for the nations {Matthew 28:16-20}

sway

2009-12-02T05:47:00.000-08:00

reason # 812 i really enjoy taking walks here. always a little gem along the way.

david platt

2009-11-30T21:04:00.000-08:00

"The most dangerous place for you to be may be right in the center of God's will."

"God rid us of the idea that that which is the most comfortable and the easiest to accomplish must be the will of God."

"Success in the Church is about the unstoppable uncontrollable Spirit of God, and the people of God, advancing the gospel of God to the ends of the earth."

christmas music is O.K. now.

2009-11-27T18:35:00.000-08:00

I know I'm a couple days late. But I hope that Thanksgiving Day was filled with rich conversations and a deeper appreciation for the goodness of the Lord.

As you can imagine, Hong Kong doesn't have an official holiday to celebrate Thanksgiving so on Thursday our team gathered at the Dean's to celebrate. Yes, we even had a Turkey!

A week or so prior to turkey day we were reminiscing and brainstorming over all-too-familiar Thanksgiving dishes, and divided up culinary responsibilities to cover everything. As we brought together different family tastes and traditions, the array of food yielded a feeling of familiarity and a little glimpse of home.

Mom, Dad, Teresa, Carl, Meg [yes, I'm going to name all of you], Ash, Zach, & MC : I missed you so much. Holidays will forever bring memories of each of you. Thank you for celebrating with me what the Lord is doing and for your constant encouragement.

I love and miss each one of you so much.

Of course it was different, but I count it such a blessing to celebrate the Lord's provision here in Hong Kong. When I begin to think back about my journey here and how God has done nothing less than shower goodness upon us, this year's Thanksgiving will be treasured as a day tangibly marked by his provision for a vision.

Looking forward.

Time to turn on Christmas music- my favorite time.

it's almost that day

2009-11-25T03:16:00.001-08:00

thank·ful

Pronunciation: \ˈthaŋk-fəl\

Function: adjective

Date: before 12th century

1 : conscious of benefit received 2 : expressive of thanks 3 : well pleased : glad

some of my favorite moments...

2009-11-17T19:40:00.000-08:00

...look a lot like this.

white elephant & hot pot

2009-11-15T20:45:00.001-08:00

Yesterday we were able to introduce our friends in English class to the ever-so-seasonal game White Elephant. The gifts in our circle ranged from USB key chains to the pieces of a board game. While the game itself is entertaining to play with friends, my favorite part of the afternoon was commentary from Chris. After explaining to him that you try and solicit gifts to others if you don't want the one you unwrapped; he echoed "this (whatever happened to be in his hand) is so useful!" at the start of each person's turn. His efforts were met with a "steal" a few times, but the remainder of the time he brought us lots of laughter. I ended up with a plastic Quaker tupperware container.

Did I "steal" it from someone? Sure did. Twice.

After church, Cat & I met our friends Gillian & Cecilia for dinner. They had invited us over for an authentic Chinese meal at their home. The meal they prepared is called hot pot, and if you've never heard of/tasted it before, the name explains it pretty well. I wish I could tell you what all they mixed in the soup that we cooked our meat & veggies in, but they told us they just made it up as they went. Honestly, I was somewhat nervous about what we would be eating before we arrived. When you experience dining in another culture, you soon learn that things aren't always what they appear to be or seem to be on the menu. But Gillian & Cecilia did an amazing job, dinner was d-e-l-i-c-i-o-u-s. I think Cat & I ate 90% of the potatoes on the table, successfully used our chopsticks the entire meal, and laughed a lot.

I'm so thankful to be here.

in transition

2009-11-10T07:35:00.000-08:00

This little snapshot is a part of my everyday. {Disclaimer: If you think this is my version of Where's Waldo, you can give your eyes a rest; there is nothing particularly special about this photo. But it does give you a small glimpse into the view that spurred the following thoughts.} This little intersection, like most of Hong Kong, is a place of transition. When I happened to peek over the railing to capture this view, it was early in the afternoon and traffic was low. But as I stood there for a moment I realized that no one stopped. Everyone was in motion, in constant transition: going, coming, to here, from there; and in this particular place, I do the same thing. I don't think about stopping because there is really no reason to. Yet, whenever someone pauses in the midst of the sea of people, my eyes are drawn into what they are doing and I reason that they must have a purpose for taking on a new role as a blockade to the oncoming flow of people. People don't just hit the brakes when life beckons them to do the opposite. But what if there was a reason to stop. Stop moving so fast. Stop talking so much. Stop traveling on autopilot through all too familiar places. What if there was a reason to stop and listen?What if there was life to be gained and love to be known? What if no one took the time to stop and speak truth, how would they hear? What if it meant there was risk involved? My heart sank in my chest as I became overwhelmed with the thought that most of the individuals scurrying past my line of vision were of the ones whom have not heard. As my life continues to unfold alongside them, I don't want to miss knowing who they really are. But what if, what if I stopped, what if they stopped and listened? Not to draw attention to myself or become a blockade, but to speak of the One who loved them before time began. The One who has pursued them relentlessly with his grace. Oh the great privilege it is to tell the story of redemption in Jesus.

If I have lost you in the middle of my analogy, I apologize. If you are worried that I am on my way to the MTR station with a bullhorn and a box to stand on, rest assured that is not the case. The point being that we move ever more swiftly through this life. And as we are equipped with the gospel, we can not continue on in silence. We must take the time to stop and share.

How then will they call on him in whom they have not believed?

And how are they to believe in him of whom they have never heard?

And how are they to hear without someone preaching? ...

Romans 10:14.

new friends that you should meet.

2009-11-09T08:40:00.000-08:00

changing me

2009-11-05T07:53:00.000-08:00

psalm 33:13-22

The Lord looks down from heaven;

he sees all the children of man;

from where he sits enthroned he looks out on all the inhabitants of the earth,

he who fashions the hearts of them all and observe all their deeds.

The king is not saved by his great army;

a warrior is not delivered by his great strength.

The war horse is a false hope for salvation,

and by its great might it cannot rescue.

Behold, the eye of the Lord is on those who fear him,

on those who hope in his steadfast love,

that he may deliver their soul from death

and keep them alive in famine.

Our soul waits for the Lord;

he is our help and our shield.

For our heart is glad in him, because we trust in his holy name.

Let your steadfast love, O Lord, be upon us,

even as we hope in you.

handwriting

2009-11-04T20:56:00.000-08:00

I peeked in the mailbox this morning to find a gray envelope & a little surprise from my big sister. I'm not sure what it is about handwritten words, but they get to me every time. I guess it's just the thought that goes into the whole process. It's one thing to think of something that you need/want to say. But it's a whole different ball game to pick up a pen and take time to write them down and mail them around the world. Thanks so much to family & friends who have taken the time to send handwritten words. They mean more than you know.

shades

2009-10-30T20:59:00.000-07:00

Yep, I broke another pair. I'm hopeful that one day my sunglasses and I will have a friendship that last longer than a couple weeks before they are lost or broken.

comma problem

2009-10-30T01:35:00.000-07:00

Main Entry: com·ma

Pronunciation: \ˈkä-mə\

Function: noun

Etymology: Late Latin, from Latin, part of a sentence, from Greek komma segment, clause, fromkoptein to cut — more at capon

Date: 1554

1 : a punctuation mark , used especially as a mark of separation within the sentence [2 : pause, interval ] 3 : any of several nymphalid butterflies (genus Polygonia) with a silvery comma-shaped mark on the underside of the hind wings

I just love a comma. Over half of the commas I use when I write are not necessary, or in, the, wrong, place. If this misappropriation has irritated you, caused frustration, given you urges to punch your computer screen, or caused your finger to move that mouse over the [X] on the corner of the screen and click out of my blog before you could get past the first paragraph; please know that these efforts of misuse are not intentional. In all honesty, I just place them where my thoughts take a pause. I always heard that commas were like a pause in a sentence, so there's my simple (most likely way off base) logic. If you've noticed my misappropriation of the comma, please except my apology.

thursday

2009-10-29T23:49:00.000-07:00

"Then, at break of day, the king arose and went in haste to the den of lions. As he came near to the den where Daniel was, he cried out in a tone of anguish. The king declared to Daniel, "O Daniel, servant of the living God, has your God, whom you serve continually, been able to deliver you from the lions?"

[Daniel 6:19&20]

On Thursday morning at Island, there is a group of women who have joined together to study the book of Daniel. This week we found ourselves in an all too familiar story of Daniel in the lion's den. Of course there is much life to be found in the way that our Sovereign God chose to shut the mouths of lions and spare Daniel's life. But Thursday morning my spirit was pierced by the steadfast nature of Daniel's integrity and the holy habits that he had formed over his lifetime. While still surrounded by a pack of lions, Darius shouts down to Daniel and acknowledges the living God whom Daniel serves. I love that he calls to Daniel and accompanies this acknowledgment. He also included a key word when he spoke of his service: continually. Daniel didn't decide to turn to the Lord when he was being lowered in the lions den. His heart had met infinite love and as he lived and walked and loved in light of the Love he knew, he served continually. I pray that this feeble self can be found steadfast at the end of my days. Thursday afternoon yielded incredible time with the women on my team. We joined together to talk through what we've been learning lately, and take time to sync our hearts around truth for these days. The evening ended with lots of laughter and encouragement from precious cards that came to us all the way from Atlanta, GA.

[Annie & Ellie: thank you so much for your encouragement, you are both so thoughtful!]

As another week is bringing itself to a close, the days have seemed to pass so quickly, but they have been rich and I'm looking forward to surprises yet to unfold in the month of November.

wed nes day

2009-10-29T08:31:00.000-07:00

These boots were made for walkin', and since I had a lot of walkin' to do Wednesday, they made their debut. The morning was full of reading and preparing for bible study Thursday morning at Island ECC. I met Vivien for lunch at Festival Walk. And after a few minutes of deliberation in the middle of people scurrying all around us in the food court, she decided on McDonalds. If you know much about my childhood you know that I survived off of McDonald's chicken nuggets and french fries for most of my childhood. If you have any inclination that I was a picky eater, you would be correct. So, at lunch I defaulted to my childhood delight and shared great conversation with Vivien. After lunch my boots took a little stroll towards Admiralty into Starbucks where I spent the later half of the afternoon sharing my story with another dear friend, Kathy. On a far less significant side note: someone asked me for directions as I was making my way home. Perhaps it was because they assumed I could speak English, or perhaps it was because they figured someone wearing boots was walking in a familiar direction. I'll let you decide. That evening our team gathered together for our first official HK BBQ. We had the great joy of introducing our friends Rick & Rob, who were visiting, to new friends here and watch them connect. We were also able introduce them to some classic American staples such as hamburgers and marshmallows.

tuesday

2009-10-26T09:44:00.000-07:00

my toes tapped across campus to lunch with a few wonderful new friends. it was refreshing to sit and listen to their hearts unfold as we talked about their future. on the outside looking in, there seems to be one barrier after another preventing us from truly understanding one another. the obvious: there's a language barrier; a big one that would seem to hinder a depth of conversation. the not-so-obvious: cultural barriers that each one of us carry from our inheritance. as i approach these barriers, i'm beginning to realize that there is choice to their hindrance in our friendships. so instead of letting them separate us, they have now become points of conversation. it's a joy to gain deeper understanding and see how our differences no longer assume misunderstanding. for now they have begun to yield connection and compassion.

a week in my shoes : monday

2009-10-26T09:40:00.000-07:00

with feet fitted in shoes that remind me of places already tread; living life in this city of new experiences alongside familiar faces is becoming wonderfully familiar and all the more surprising. yesterday i found myself sitting around a squared table with incredible individuals that i get to call friends. as we recounted God's promises in light of what we are all learning, i was humbled at what he has already done in our midst in the past few months. this meeting was followed by lunch at one of our favorite places that we like to call "Tommy's", Tommy just happened to be one of the first waiters that communicated with us in english so the name has stuck ever since. we rarely stray from our favorite dishes. but my theory is, when the food is that good i suppose there is really no need to branch out when i can't read the menu. the day ended with jason and i going on a treasure hunt with 3 precious little munchkins. time with them always includes laughter. the treasure hunt last night included making a crown and when i asked caleb if i could take a picture of his crown, this was his default pose. monday was lovely.

saturday mornings

2009-10-16T20:58:00.001-07:00

i love that saturday mornings usually look a lot like this. one thing i don't love about saturday mornings is stepping on my cup of coffee that was sitting next to my bed. not just a nudge, i stepped on it. the bright side is: the coffee, in it's entirety, has been soaked off the floor and has left a lovely coffee shop aroma for my room. i can just close my eyes and pretend i'm at an actual coffee shop reading, but i suppose that wouldn't be too conducive for actually reading. hope you have a lovely saturday wherever this may find you. watch your step.

my portion for today

2009-10-16T19:14:00.000-07:00

Fret not yourself because of evildoers; be not envious of wrongdoers!

For they will soon fade like the grass and wither like the green herb.

Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land, and befriend faithfulness.

Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act.

He will bring your righteousness forth as the light, and your justice as the noonday.

Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him...

"green"

2009-10-13T08:06:00.000-07:00

Call it "green", call it environmentally conscious, call it "I never felt shameful about carrying a plastic bag home from the grocery store till I shopped in Hong Kong". I have to admit that my minimal efforts would not qualify me to fit into any of the "green" categories. While in Auburn I did manage to form good habits of separating cardboard, paper, and plastics; and yes, I even drove them to the recycling center. I'm sure that the fumes from driving my carefully separated recycled goods only canceled out my attempts at saving the planet. Nonetheless, over the past couple months I have found myself avoiding carrying a plastic bag at all costs. Perhaps an example scenario would help to elaborate my point. Let's say I am in the market to buy some vegetables. In the U.S., I would hop in my car, drive to Kroger, stroll through the isle with my over sized cart that rolls whichever way it pleases [still one of the great mysteries in my book-why shopping carts always seemed to roll sideways or roll normally until you were trying to pass someone and would inevitably jolt into the side of their cart-I digress...] after selecting said veggies, proceed to the self-checkout, dig through my purse for my wallet, place my produce in plastic Kroger bags and waltz out to my car without thinking twice about it. In Hong Kong, hop on the lift, walk across the street to the store, pick up a basket, try desperately to run into as few people as I can while maneuvering through the smaller isles towards the vegetables. After spotting what I need from the second row of people huddled around the desired item, I try to grab whatever I need as quickly as possible, apologizing and reaching across 4 sets of arms in the process, then when I reach the check out I begin to dig through my purse with hope that I packed my compact shopping bag so I don't have to face the look of requesting a plastic bag, after the grocer packs my items I swiftly move along for the next customer. But hypothetically speaking, let's say I forgot to put my compact little shopping bag in my purse one afternoon and instead of asking for a plastic bag to carry things home, I paid for my vegetables and just put them in my purse-hypothetically speaking of course. In the U.S. if a grocer even hinted at the idea of stuffing vegetables in my purse instead of a plastic bag I would have thought they were a little extreme, or so "green"if you will. In the midst of making light of a legitimate concern in a big city, I have to laugh at myself defaulting to broccoli in my purse over a plastic bag.

what's in a name

2009-10-12T02:17:00.001-07:00

Last night I found myself huddled around a table with new friends.

As you can see, they enlightened me about a few differences in our names.

I'm learning that embracing, and celebrating, cultural differences yields to deeper appreciation.

I hope I never grow weary of embracing whomever is before me.

flashback

2009-10-10T03:06:00.000-07:00

Sitting in the flat in HK looking out over the city.

Listening to the "Shine" series from Encounter last fall.

Thinking back through what I was learning this time last year.

Watching the Lord intertwine all that he has done, and is doing, in my heart and the community around me.

Humbled by Philippians 2.

Orienting myself around the truth that: "A surrendered life that is intended to glorify God is lived out in sacrifice."

conversations to be had

2009-10-05T02:47:00.001-07:00

Before arriving in Hong Kong, my knowledge of Cantonese and Putonghua [Mandarin] was minimal at best. Hong Kong is a unique place because so many cultures meet in the context of this ever growing city. For the most part, maneuvering around can be accomplished if English is your only means to understand signs/MTR stops. But there are times when I am become so frustrated with myself that I am not able to communicate well with those I'm interacting with. A couple positive thoughts have stemmed from this frustration with myself: the first is a fresh eagerness to learn the language well and to practice languages I already have some knowledge of; the second is an excitement for today, and for the future, for conversations that could be had after learning a language. And in the midst of my frustration stemming some seemingly propelling thoughts, Cat and I caught a glimpse of the language barrier breaking down. We were on the way to a photo-taking-excursion and we saw our friend Ling. She stopped us to show her latest investment: a translator. If the first picture that popped in your mind was Ling flipping through the pages of a handheld dictionary, you have far underestimated Ling. Her translator is nothing short of fancy. I would try to explain to you the intricate features and seamless way it works, but my lack of technological lingo would most certainly fall short to do it justice. But the point is not the technologically advanced gadget we used to communicate, it is Ling's desire to communicate well and her initiative in that desire. The tiny blips of sound that echoed through the lobby as we typed back and forth will be etched in my memory for a long time to come. As we waited for her to respond to questions, it was exciting to see the look on her face as she read our words in her native language. Her eagerness to communicate beyond simple greetings gave me a new perspective on connecting with people here. Perhaps if you find yourself in HK one day I'll have the joy of introducing you to this sweet friend. All that to say, I'm looking forward to conversations to be had.

today's the big day

2009-10-04T07:18:00.001-07:00

There is something so special about wedding days. But today is extraordinary because today, my best friend is marrying Mr. Mike Bailey. The ceremony is one she's always envisioned, and is sure to be nothing short of gorgeous. As I write this, Trace is probably getting her hair/make-up done and checking the clock to see if the hours would just rush to 6:00 already. I can just picture in my head all the last minute details being tied together and everyone bubbling with anticipation as the day unfolds. Mike & Trace are such a joy to know. You don't have to be in a room with them very long to know that they care deeply about one another and have so much fun together. It has been so neat to watch them walk alongside one another in their relationship so far and I feel blessed to call them friends.

[Pacey: I need you to know how absolutely thrilled for you today. I wish I could be there beside you running last minute errands and making sure you have a Diet Coke close at hand. I hope that today is everything you have hoped it would be and more. As much as it saddens be not to be there with you on this milestone day, I couldn't be more happy for you and am excited to walk through these next months and years as you and Mike experience life as husband and wife. Thank you for being the friend you are to me. I love you so much.]

right, left, then right again

2009-09-27T05:56:00.000-07:00

There are actions and reactions we all learn as we grow up. Obviously those lessons are relative to your family structure growing up and your culture. One of the first lessons i learned growing up was to look both ways before crossing the street. As I would sprint towards the door to go outside, even before my hand could turn the door knob, my parents were gently reminding me of this. At first the application only happened through a conscious effort. As my toes paralleled the edge of the sidewalk, I would stop, look right, left, then right again; and if the coast was clear, make my way across the road. Eventually, I began to chime in as my parents repeated this lesson; not only hearing the lesson over again, but echoing it aloud as well. It began to happen naturally. It was most certainly ingrained in my mind. I heard, I was reminded, I echoed, I learned, and I acted. Lessons learned have all seemed to eventually play out this way. But as my toes parallel a new sidewalk on a new latitude and longitude, I feel as though this lesson has applied itself in a fresh and deeper sense. The sight of this great city and all it entails finds me running towards the door eager to experience what is just beyond the door frame. The lessons I've learned echo through mind, and I find myself repeating them aloud as my hand stretches for the door. But before I act, I draw back to what I know to be true. And today and in this season, I find that I am functioning out of a foundation that has been built over years preparing me for these very days. I've had time to evaluate my roots. Light had been shed on the things I need to purge from my life and things that stir my heart. I have heard the Lord's voice so clearly, and as I continue to learn, I want my life to be in sync with those words that give me life. I elaborate all this to say, that I desperately don't want to learn how to live and forget why I'm living. For if I lose sight of why, I have lost the heart behind my living and my living will amount to nothing more than a robotic skit played out to imitate what I am truly created for. As my hand turns the door knob opening up my heart to something so new, Isaiah 30:21 turns itself over in my mind: 'Whether you turn to the right or the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, "This is the way, walk in it."

humbled

2009-09-24T09:06:00.001-07:00

by no deserving measure of my own, i get to adventure around hong kong with these lovely ladies. each bringing to the table unique perspective and experiences, the scope of compassion and knowledge to be gained from these friendships is immense. i cherish time spent with them and look forward to conversations to be had over coffee or on the mtr just processing through life here and what it means to live a life spent for the sake of the gospel; loving our neighbors all along the way.